How to Talk with Teens about Sextortion

How to Talk with Teens about Sextortion

Working with teenagers is incredibly rewarding, but let’s be real—sometimes it comes with some tough conversations. One of the most challenging topics we need to address today is sextortion and online scams.

These digital dangers are unfortunately becoming more common, and it’s crucial that we help our teens navigate them safely for their mental health and physical well-being.

Why It’s Important to Talk About Sextortion and Online Scams

Sextortion is when someone threatens to share explicit images or information about another person unless they comply with demands, usually for more images, money, or favors. Some of these schemes can have become quite complex too, including posing as brands to gain the teen and parents’ trust as they coax teens to share information or photos.

Nearly 1 in 3 preteens now aspire to be influencers according to this recent New York Times investigation. So offering a brand sponsorship is a very effective avenue for predators to achieve access to minors, even with permission from their parents.

Officer Gomez has seen this often in his experience as a School Resource Officer. He’s a great resource to follow. He talks more about this scheme in particular in an interview with The Ranch Podcast.

Online scams, on the other hand, can range from phishing attempts to more personal attacks that exploit trust.

Teens are particularly vulnerable because they spend so much time online and may not always recognize the warning signs of a scam or know what to do if they’re targeted- which isn’t surprising since most adults probably don’t either!

As educators, youth workers, and parents, it’s especially important that we do our best to understand the digital landscape so we can equip teens to stay safe. Even more critical, however, is our role as safe adults.

By having open, honest conversations, we can empower them to protect themselves and know where to turn if they need help.

How to Start the Conversation

  1. Create a Safe Space: Before diving into the topic, ensure your teens feel comfortable talking about sensitive issues. Let them know this is a judgment-free zone where their feelings and experiences are valid.
  2. Use Real-Life Examples: Teens respond well to stories, especially those that feel relatable. You can use stories from news reports or even hypothetical scenarios to illustrate what sextortion and online scams look like.
  3. Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of lecturing, engage them in a conversation. Questions like, “What would you do if someone you didn’t know asked for a private photo?” or “Have you ever seen a suspicious message online?” can spark important discussions.
  4. Share Resources: Encourage teens to explore resources like the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) or CyberTipline. These platforms offer tons of information and reporting tools that are teen-friendly.

What to Emphasize During the Conversation

  • Trust Your Gut
    If something feels off, it probably is. Teens should trust their instincts and not engage with anyone or anything that makes them uncomfortable.
  • The Importance of Privacy
    Remind them that once something is online, it’s almost impossible to take back. Emphasize the importance of keeping personal information, including photos and videos, private.
  • Reporting Is Key
    Encourage teens to report anything suspicious to a trusted adult immediately. Whether it’s a strange message, an inappropriate request, or a scam, reporting it can prevent further harm.
  • They’re Not Alone
    One of the most important things to communicate is that if something happens, they are not alone. Many others have faced similar situations, and there are always people willing to help.
  • They Are Not Going to Be in Trouble. 
    Many teens and kids are afraid to report what’s happening to them because they are afraid they’ll be in trouble.  It’s important to let them know that authorities and trusted adults are on their side.

Follow-Up: Keeping the Conversation Going

After the initial conversation, keep the dialogue open. Check in with your teens regularly to see if they’ve encountered anything unusual online. Make it clear that they can always come to you with concerns, no matter how small they may seem.

You can also bring in guest speakers, such as representatives from local law enforcement or cyber safety experts, to reinforce these messages. The Dallas/Fort Worth Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force is a great local resource that could provide valuable insights.

Kelly Fann

Kelly Fann

Digital Media Manager

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ChatGPT + Summer Bucket List | 161

ChatGPT + Summer Bucket List | 161

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The Ultimate Summer Bucket List for Teens and Their Families

Summer is a time for relaxation, adventure, and creating unforgettable memories with your loved ones. With longer days and warmer weather, there’s no better opportunity to explore new activities and bond as a family. Here’s a fun-filled summer bucket list for teens and their families to enjoy together.

1. Outdoor Movie Night

Transform your backyard into a magical movie theater under the stars. Set up a screen and a projector, or find outdoor movie events in your area. Bring cozy blankets, pillows, and a selection of your favorite movies. Don’t forget the popcorn and snacks to complete the cinematic experience.

2. Start a Fight (A Fun One!)

Food Fight

Channel your inner child with a playful food fight. Choose foods that are easy to clean up, like whipped cream or mashed potatoes, and head to a designated area where messes are welcome. Make sure to set some ground rules to keep it safe and fun for everyone.

Water Balloon Fight

Cool off on a hot day with a classic water balloon fight. Fill up plenty of balloons, divide into teams, and let the water warfare begin. You can also set up targets for a friendly competition to see who has the best aim.

Nerf War

Gather your Nerf guns and darts for an epic battle. Create obstacles and hiding spots in your backyard or a local park. Teams can strategize and work together to capture the flag or defend their territory.

Color Powder Fight

Bring a burst of color to your summer with a color powder fight. Use safe, non-toxic color powders, and wear white clothes for the best effect. This vibrant activity is perfect for an afternoon of fun and makes for great photo opportunities.

3. Themed Snack Party

Candy Salad

Create a delightful and colorful candy salad. Mix different types of candies in a large bowl, and let everyone add their favorite treats. It’s a sweet and playful twist on a traditional salad that’s sure to be a hit.

Color Food Baskets

Organize a party where each guest brings a basket of food in a specific color. Arrange the foods creatively, and enjoy a rainbow feast. This is a fun way to try new snacks and enjoy a visually appealing spread.

Board Party

Everyone brings a different charcuterie board. Get creative and have everyone bring a different themed board: a sweet board, a dips board, a cheese and crackers board, etc. Or by country: an Italian board, a Greek board, and so forth. You could even play board games. You get the idea.

Collaborative Dinner

Invite friends and family over for a collaborative cooking challenge. Each person brings an ingredient, and together, you have to create a delicious dish using everything provided. It’s a fun way to experiment in the kitchen and discover new flavors.

4. Game Night

Unplug from technology and gather for a night of board games, card games, and puzzles. Choose a variety of games to keep everyone engaged, from strategy games to party games. It’s a great way to foster teamwork, friendly competition, and lots of laughs.

5. Be a Tourist in Your City for a Day

Rediscover the hidden gems in your home city by being a tourist for a day. Visit local attractions, museums, parks, and historical sites that you’ve never explored before.

Let ChatGPT Plan Your Day

For a unique twist, let ChatGPT plan your itinerary. Share your interests and preferences, and get customized recommendations for a day full of exciting activities and new experiences. You might uncover surprising destinations and activities you never knew existed.

Creating a summer bucket list ensures that your family makes the most of the season by blending fun, adventure, learning, and relaxation. These activities provide opportunities for bonding, personal growth, and making lasting memories. So grab your calendar, start planning, and get ready for a summer filled with joy and connection!

Also in this episode

  • Should teens be using ChatGPT 4 and talking tips for helping them navigate it.
  • An update for the future of the Teen Life Podcast and exciting things coming soon.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

About Us

Karlie Duke

Karlie Duke

Director of Communications

Tobin Hodges

Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett

Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host

Follow Us

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Lapse + Meta Lawsuit + Teacher Burnout + Advent | Ep. 136

Lapse + Meta Lawsuit + Teacher Burnout + Advent | Ep. 136

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How to Help Tired Teachers with Mid-Year Burnout

As winter break approaches, teachers, parents, and students all struggle to finish the semester strong. Kids are crazy. Tired teachers struggle to get all the grades in and contain classrooms of tired, excitable students. It gets dark earlier. How can everyone survive this time of year?

Here are just a few ways parents can help tired teachers.

Open Communication

Maintain open and respectful communication with teachers. Establishing a positive relationship allows for discussing concerns or challenges, fostering a supportive environment for both parties.

Respect Boundaries

Understand and respect teachers’ time and boundaries. Avoid expecting immediate responses after school hours and be mindful of their workload.

Support Classroom Policies

Familiarize yourself with classroom policies and support teachers in implementing them. Consistency between home and school environments can ease teachers’ workload and create a conducive learning atmosphere.

Volunteering and Assistance

Offer to volunteer or assist in classroom activities, field trips, or projects. Your involvement can alleviate some of the workload and demonstrate support for the teacher.

Encourage Positive Behavior

Reinforce positive behavior and values taught in the classroom at home. This alignment helps create a consistent and supportive environment for learning.

Regular Updates

Stay informed about your child’s progress and any updates from the school. Respond promptly to communications from teachers to facilitate a smoother interaction and support their efforts.

Appreciation and Recognition

Express gratitude and appreciation for the work teachers do. A simple thank-you note or gesture can go a long way in boosting their morale and motivation.

Respectful Disagreements

In case of disagreements or concerns, address them respectfully and directly with the teacher. Open dialogue and collaboration can lead to effective resolutions.

Parent-Teacher Associations (PTAs)

Participate actively in PTAs or school committees. Contributing to the school community and initiatives can indirectly support teachers by improving overall school dynamics.

Understanding Challenges

Recognize the challenges teachers face, such as managing diverse student needs or adapting to changing educational standards. Having empathy for these challenges can help create a more supportive environment.

Be sure to listen to the full episode for Tobin’s tips on tone and other ways to help everyone make it to winter break!

Also in this episode:

  • The Lapse app, 3rd in the App Store a couple of weeks ago, has now outpaced TikTok and Google. The app mimics a disposable camera that snaps pictures and then has a wait period (as the film “develops”) before you can view them.
  • States across the US have filed a lawsuit against Meta saying that Meta — which owns Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, and Messenger — violated consumer protection laws by unfairly ensnaring children and deceiving users about the safety of its platforms. It accuses Meta of having profoundly altered the psychological and social realities of a generation of young Americans.
  • Not everyone participates in Christmas, but there are many winter holidays and traditions to celebrate.

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources about the Lapse app, social media lawsuits, and winter holiday traditions.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

About Us

Karlie Duke

Karlie Duke

Director of Communications

Tobin Hodges

Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett

Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host

Follow Us

More Resources You Might Like

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Episode 36: Christmas Traditions
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Snapchat + Teen Hairstyles + First Cell Phone Advice | Ep. 133

Snapchat + Teen Hairstyles + First Cell Phone Advice | Ep. 133

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Are you ready for your child’s first cell phone?

There’s a lot to consider before putting your child’s first cell phone under the tree this Christmas. If you’re not sure what to look for or how to set your teen up for success, keep reading or hit the play button! We’ve got talking points, tips, and phone options to consider before you complete your order.

We’ll also give you the latest on teen hairstyles for boys and girls and what you need to know about what’s new on Snapchat.

What’s new on Snapchat?

Before we jump into the latest features, let’s go over the basics of Snapchat for those who are new to the platform. Snapchat is a multimedia messaging app that allows users to share photos and videos with friends and followers. The defining feature of Snapchat is the ephemeral nature of its content – messages, photos, and stories disappear after a set time, adding a sense of spontaneity and impermanence to the experience.

New Features

Live Maps

With Live Maps, you can see where your friends are and, in return, they can see your location. To enhance privacy, you can enter “ghost mode” in your settings, ensuring your location remains hidden. Live Maps also showcases “Hot Spots,” allowing you to explore trending areas and see other users’ posts, even if they’re not in your friend list.

Spotlight

Snapchat’s answer to the popular short-form video format seen on Reels and TikTok is called “Spotlight.” This feature lets users create and share short video content with a wide audience, giving you a chance to showcase your creativity and gain followers.

Snapchat+

For those who want an enhanced Snapchat experience, Snapchat+ is available for a monthly fee of $3.99. With Snapchat+, you can customize your Snapchat experience by moving or removing the Snapchat AI chatbot, setting custom story expiration lengths, personalizing badges, enjoying Story Boost, and having extra Snap Replays. While some of these features may seem trivial, they can be a fun way to personalize your Snapchat usage.

Family Center

The introduction of Family Center is a significant step by Snapchat to address concerns about child safety on the platform. This in-app tool allows parents to monitor their teenage children’s interactions on Snapchat without invading their privacy. Parents can see who their children are interacting with, and Snapchat has plans to enhance this feature in the future. However, parents cannot set time limits for app usage or eavesdrop on private conversations.

Pros of Snapchat Parental Monitoring

The Family Center feature allows parents to keep an eye on their teenage children’s Snapchat activity, providing an extra layer of security.

Discover Fun New Places on Snap Maps

Live Maps and Hot Spots make it exciting to discover new places and activities, both locally and globally.

A Way to Stay Connected

Snapchat remains a popular platform for staying connected with friends and family through photos, videos, and messages.

A Way for Young People to Get News

The “Discover” tab offers a unique way for younger users to access news, trends, and entertainment.

Cons of Snapchat Limited Monitoring

While Family Center provides some parental control, it’s not as robust as some parents may desire, lacking features like setting time limits.

Location Tracking

The Live Maps feature, while exciting, raises concerns about location tracking and privacy.

Disappearing Messages and Photos

The ephemeral nature of Snapchat content can be a double-edged sword, as it can lead to misunderstandings or miscommunication.

Whether you love Snapchat or not, it remains one of the most popular apps among teens. It’s crucial to be aware of and use its features responsibly- to be aware of the privacy implications, especially when it comes to location tracking and the ephemeral nature of the platform. With the introduction of the Family Center, Snapchat is taking steps to address these concerns and make the platform safer for young users. As always, staying informed and using the platform wisely is the key to enjoying Snapchat to the fullest!

What’s trending in teen hairstyles

Hairstyles have always played a pivotal role in expressing individuality and cultural heritage. Keep reading for a look at the hottest teen hair trends for 2023, as well as the 2019 legislative development initiated by Dove, the CROWN Act.

Trending Styles for Boys

Mullets

The ’80s-inspired mullet is making a fierce comeback. This iconic hairstyle, characterized by shorter hair on the sides and back with longer hair at the top, offers a unique blend of vintage charm and contemporary flair. With modern variations and a hint of rebellion, the mullet is capturing the hearts of young boys looking to make a statement with their hair.

Perm Fronts

Perms are no longer limited to your grandma’s era. Boys are embracing perm fronts, adding texture and volume to their hair while keeping the sides short and neat. This trend allows boys to experiment with their style and achieve a unique look that stands out.

Swoops

Swoops are all about bangs and fringes that create a dramatic, eye-catching effect. They add a touch of sophistication and can be adapted to various lengths and textures, giving boys the flexibility to express their personality through their hairstyle.

Trending Hairstyles for Girls

Bangs (Taylor Bangs & Curtain Bangs)

Bangs never go out of style, and this year we’re seeing the resurgence of Taylor bangs (inspired by Taylor Swift) and curtain bangs. These styles frame the face beautifully, offering a chic and timeless look that can be customized to suit any hair type or length.

Natural Curls

Embracing natural curls is a growing trend that emphasizes the beauty of one’s hair in its true form. Girls with naturally curly hair are flaunting their stunning locks, and many are opting for shorter, textured cuts that emphasize their curls’ natural bounce and vibrancy.

Heatless Curls/Crimped

Girls are exploring heatless methods to achieve those coveted beachy waves and crimped textures. Heatless curls and crimps are not only more gentle on the hair but also showcase a fun and effortless style that’s perfect for any occasion.

Embracing Natural Hair

  • 80% of Black women reported having to change their hair to fit into the workplace.
  • Black women are 1.5 times more likely to be sent home from the workplace because of their hair.
  • Shockingly, 100 percent of Black elementary school girls in majority-white schools who report experiencing hair discrimination state they experienced the discrimination by the age of 10.

Starting from September 1, 2023, the CROWN Act came into effect in Texas schools, marking a significant step forward. The Texas statute clearly states that any dress or grooming policy adopted by a school district “may not discriminate against a hair texture or protective hairstyle commonly or historically associated with race.” This law is a beacon of hope for a more inclusive and respectful world where people are free to express their cultural heritage and personal style without fear of discrimination.

In conclusion, 2023 is all about embracing diversity and individuality in hair trends. Whether you’re a boy looking to channel the spirit of the ’80s or a girl proudly flaunting your natural curls, your hair is a canvas for self-expression. Additionally, the CROWN Act’s progression is a significant step towards fostering an inclusive society where everyone is free to be themselves, with their natural hair celebrated and respected. So, go ahead and embrace the hair trend that resonates with you and remember that your hair is a beautiful reflection of your unique identity.

Are you thinking of getting your kid their first cell phone this Christmas?

The holiday season is approaching, and if you’re contemplating whether to gift your child their first cell phone, you’re not alone. The question of when to introduce your child to a smartphone is a topic that many parents grapple with, and there’s no one-size-fits-all answer. In this blog post, we’ll explore the complexities of this decision and offer some guidance to help you navigate this milestone.

No “Right Age” for a First Cell Phone

It’s essential to understand that there’s no universal “right age” for a child to receive their first cell phone. While the “Wait Until 8th” pledge has gained popularity, it’s worth noting that it’s becoming less practical in the modern age of technology. The demands of school, the need for communication, and the prevalence of digital tools make the decision more complex than ever.

Recent Trends in Kids’ Smartphone Ownership

Recent survey data shows that 42% of kids in the United States have their first cell phone by the age of 10. By the time they reach 14, smartphone ownership climbs to an astounding 91%. While these numbers offer a snapshot of current trends, they shouldn’t be the sole basis for your decision.

Developmental Readiness Over Age

Experts emphasize that developmental readiness is more important than age when considering a child’s first cell phone. Some important developmental milestones that might guide your decision include:

  1. Complex Thoughts and Improved Reasoning: Can your child handle more complex thoughts and reasoning? Are they capable of making responsible decisions?
  2. Developing Solutions: Is your child showing signs of developing their own solutions to problems? Are they becoming more self-reliant?
  3. Empathy and Consideration: Is your child demonstrating empathy and thinking of others? Are they mindful of how their actions affect those around them?
  4. Understanding Right and Wrong: Are they developing a stronger sense of right and wrong? Are they able to distinguish between appropriate and inappropriate behavior?
  5. Respecting Boundaries: Is your child responding appropriately to limits and boundaries set by parents and teachers?

Talking About Expectations

Before you decide to get your child a cell phone, it’s crucial to have a conversation about expectations. Consider creating a contract together that outlines how they will and won’t use their phone. Here are some important questions to get the conversation started:

  • What would you use the phone for, and why do you need it?
  • How much daily phone usage do you think is appropriate?
  • Where will you charge your device at night?
  • Are there times during the day when phone use should be restricted?
  • What are the rules about using the phone at school?
  • What consequences should be in place if the phone is lost?

Alternatives to Smartphones

If you’re not comfortable giving your child a smartphone but want to provide them with a communication device, there are alternatives to consider:

Smart Watches
Options like the Gabb Watch, Apple Watch SE, Gizmo Watch, and TickTalk Watch offer limited functionality, allowing communication without full internet access. However, be aware that many schools are now banning smartwatches in the classroom, so they may need to remain in lockers or backpacks during school hours.

Kid Phones
Devices like the Gabb Phone, Pinwheel, Light Phone 2, and Wisephone are designed for children and provide essential communication features without the distractions of a full-fledged smartphone.

Flip Phones
Consider getting a basic flip phone with no internet access. While this may limit some features, it can provide a communication tool without the added distractions of smartphones. The decision to get your child their first cell phone is a personal one that depends on many factors. Focus on your child’s developmental readiness and have an open, honest conversation about expectations and responsibilities. There are various communication alternatives to consider if you’re not ready to provide a smartphone.

Ultimately, the key is to make a decision that aligns with your family’s values and ensures your child’s safety and well-being in the digital age.

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources about your child’s first cell phone, teen hairstyle trends and Snapchat.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

About Us

Karlie Duke

Karlie Duke

Director of Communications

Tobin Hodges

Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett

Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host

Follow Us

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Ep. 94: Teen Love & Snapchat

Ep. 94: Teen Love & Snapchat

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Summary:
Anyone who was young and in love once can remember the all-consuming passion of teenage romance. But is teen love real? Does it last? Chris and Karlie pull back the curtain on teen love and what happens after graduation.

They’ll give you a rundown of the key features of Snapchat and potential risks and benefits. Plus, don’t miss our top list of curious questions for starting a conversation about one of the most popular social media apps in the app store.

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources:

Questions for teens about Snapchat:

  • Do you believe your content is safer because it disappears?
  • Have you ever screenshot something on snapchat? Did you know that there are apps that help you screenshot without notifying the other person?
  • Have you ever been pressured to send inappropriate content through Snapchat?
  • Do you ever feel stressed or pressured to get on by notifications or snapstreaks?
  • Is there a healthy boundary we can set for snapchat?
  • What are your privacy settings? Do you mind if we check those to make sure you are staying safe?
  • Do you know who Snapchat shares your data with? How does that make you feel?
Have a question? If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
About Us:
Chris Robey

Chris Robey

CEO

Chris has worked with teens from a variety of backgrounds for over a decade. He has a desire to help teenagers make good choices while also giving their families tools to communicate more effectively as choices are made.
Karlie Duke

Karlie Duke

Director of Communications

Karlie was in one of Teen Life’s original support groups and has always had a heart for teenagers and the vulnerable life stage they are in. She has a wealth of experience to share from working with teens in ministry and leading support groups.

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