The Importance of Breathing

The Importance of Breathing

Breathing.

It’s so easy, so second nature that we rarely even think about doing it. Did you know that the average human being (hopefully that’s you) takes around 12-20 breaths per minute? That means that you take anywhere from 17,280 to 28,800 breaths every single day. Do you know how many of those breaths I think about on a given day? Maybe a handful.

I think about breathing…

  • When my allergies are terrible, and I can’t breathe through my nose.
  • Before I am jump in pool and need to hold my breath.
  • After my dog chews up a favorite pair of shoes, and I take 10 slow breaths before I try to give him away.
  • While I have the hiccups and hold my breath to make them stop.
  • When I am running (or let’s be real, walking) and can’t seem to catch my breath.

Breathing is one of the most important human functions and it’s the one that we probably think about the least. It is incredible that we are designed in a way that we don’t have to mentally think, “Breathe in, breathe out,” every time we need to take a breath.

However, I would argue that we need to think about taking a deep breath more often!

This week, the Teen Lifeline staff took two days to get away, take a deep breath and use it to refocus as we head into a busy few months. It is easy to run on auto-pilot and forget that taking deep, intentional breaths (both physically and emotionally) are necessary.

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For Teen Lifeline, this time away to catch our breath was invaluable. I could probably come up with 100 reasons why should should slow down every once in awhile and take a breather, but here are the top 3 reasons:

Taking a deep breath helps refocus.

Stop and take a moment to breathe in deeply. If you’re like me, this gives you an opportunity to stop thinking (even if just for a second) and gain clarity on what to do next. Take a few hours every few months to take a mental break from your every day routine. Think about what you have done in the last couple of months and what you can do to prepare for the future ones.

We all need to be refocused every now and then! Don’t continue to live, work, or play without thinking – take a mental deep breath to refocus in order to reach the goals and dreams you have planned.

 

Taking a deep breath brings perspective.

You know that feeling when you are in the middle of something big, scary and unknown? That feeling that the world is going to end and nothing is going right? Whether you are in the midst of a big decision, career change, or family crisis, taking a deep breath could be the first step to overcoming that difficult situation. Take a break from worrying, gain perspective by talking to someone you love and trust, or just take an afternoon to remember how faithful the Lord has been in the past.

In one of our Stay Calm, Don’t Panic! Podcast episodes, Dr. Michael Arnold said, “It’s when I’ve been the most still that i’ve been able to see all the amazing things God does heroically, miraculously in my life.” I love this quote! It perfectly sums up the effect that taking a deep breath and moment to be still can have on your perspective.

 

Taking a deep breath motivates you to keep going. 

When you feel like you can’t go on, when you’re exhausted and at the end of your rope, try stopping for a breath. Our Teen Lifeline retreat was the perfect opportunity to take a deep breath and gain the energy and motivation to continue helping teenagers. Sometimes more than a single breath is needed to keep going – maybe you need an hour or a whole day to relax and do some mental and emotional breathing.

When your kids are messier and crazier than ever, take a day to get a pedicure or massage. When your job is too demanding, go on a bike ride or take a quick nap in your car. When you are in a busy season of life and have no time to spare, choose to take lunch with someone who will encourage and uplift you (everyone has to eat, right?)

By taking the time for a short break and a deep breath, you will actually come back to your kids, job, or busy schedule more motivated and ready to work. It will make you a better parent, employee and an all-around happier person if you schedule some breathing time into your life.

 

Do you need to take a breather? Have you discovered any great ways to refocus, gain perfective or find motivation? If so, let us know! We’d love to learn more ways to take a deep breath!

Karlie Duke was in one of Teen Lifeline’s original support groups and now is our Communications Director. She is passionate about encouraging students to live better stories.
Don’t Panic about a Bad Story with Dr. Michael Arnold

Don’t Panic about a Bad Story with Dr. Michael Arnold

 Listen & Subscribe

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Story-telling is a powerful tool, especially when working with teenagers. In this episode, Dr. Michael Arnold joins Chris to discuss Narrative Therapy and how you can use stories to start conversations and deepen relationships with teenagers. Don’t panic about Narrative Therapy, even you can utilize the power of story and metaphors!

In this episode, you’ll find out…
  • What Narrative Therapy is and how it can be used in counseling and everyday life.
  • The 3 stages of Narrative Therapy.
  • How we can help students reconstruct their story.
  • Why story is so important in our culture.
  • How you can use Narrative Therapy to build deeper relationships with teenagers.
The coolest and the scariest thing about the future is the question mark of it.
Dr. Michael Arnold

Ask yourself…
  • Am I taking time to be still and just listen?
  • What do I want to change about my own story?
Go ask a teen…
  • What do you want this to mean in the future for you?
  • Is there anything that you want to be different in your story?
Resources:
In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:

Have a question?
If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Michael Arnold

Michael Arnold

Special Guest

Don’t Panic – Get Involved in Schools!

Don’t Panic – Get Involved in Schools!

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YouTube


 

School is a major part of every teenager’s life. It is also the best way to serve and reach students on their turf. In this episode, Chris and Karlie discuss the importance of adult involvement in schools and how you can be a resource to your community. Don’t panic about the current state of our teenagers and their schools, let’s get involved and start making a difference by reaching out to public schools!

In this episode, you’ll find out…

  • Why it is important to volunteer and get involved in your local school.
  • How school involvement benefits both the school staff and the students.
  • Real-life examples of ways to get involved in schools.
  • 3 different stories of how people in our community our reaching out to schools.
  • A 3-step process to volunteering on a school campus.

Ask yourself…

  • Is there a school close by that I would like to get involved with?
  • What skills or services could I offer to my local school?

Go ask a school campus…

  • Do you have a volunteer coordinator that I can get in touch with?
  • How can I help?
  • What can I do to support your staff and students?

Resources

In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:
Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

Don’t Panic about Foster Care with Shiloh Jones

Don’t Panic about Foster Care with Shiloh Jones

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If you know a teenager who is in the foster care system or who is living with someone other than their parents, you need to listen to this episode! We were thrilled to sit down and listen to the advice and insight Shiloh Jones brings! How do you interact with a teenager who lives in foster care? How can you be helpful and encouraging in the midst of a difficult situation? Don’t panic about foster care – you can be a supportive, encouraging force in a teenager’s life!

In this episode, you’ll find out…

  • The issues that children and teens in the foster care system have to deal with.
  • Why a child might enter foster care in the first place.
  • How foster children relate to the 5 Stages of Grief.
  • The unique restrictions and regulations put on teenagers in foster care.
  • What “aging out” of foster care looks like.
  • How you can support and encourage a teenager who is living apart from their parents.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I willing to be a stable, consistent relationship in this student’s life?
  • Have I noticed a change in attitude or behavior?
  • Am I being sensitive and aware of holidays and anniversary dates?

Go ask a teen…

  • What’s going on? How have things been?
  • What do you need?
  • Do you feel safe? Do you feel like you are in a safe place where you can be yourself and start to heal?

Resources

In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:

About Us

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Shiloh Jones

Shiloh Jones

Special Guest

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

You Said WHAT?! – A Guide to Teen Talk

You Said WHAT?! – A Guide to Teen Talk

When you hang out with teenagers every week who tend to push the boundaries and find themselves in trouble at school, you have learn some new vocabulary pretty quickly! This is the position I find myself in…often.

I cannot tell you how many times I have sat in a group, dumbfounded and confused, while the entire room laughs at a word or phrase I don’t know. Teenagers can sometimes have a different language. They talk in lots of letters and seemingly innocent phrases can mean something else entirely!

So what can we do? How do we keep up? What do these words even mean?!

If you spend any time with teenagers, you should find these principles helpful (and stick around for our teen term guide at the bottom):

Pay attention

This one seems self-explanatory, I know! But if you aren’t paying attention to what your teen is saying, the words they are speaking to their friends or the phrases they use in text messages and on social media, you won’t know where to start. Pay attention to what they, and their close friends, are saying – especially if you hear something that doesn’t make sense (i.e. a bunch of letters like wtf or bae).

Take note of what you don’t understand and follow-up on it! They often think that they are getting away with something by using code, so turn the tables on them and start listening and asking questions!

 

Ask them for clarification

After you have paid attention and hear a word that you don’t know, ask them about it. It could be possible that they don’t even really understand what it means and just hear it at school, or they might start acting funny and you’ll know you’re on to something!

If you hear something you are concerned about, don’t be afraid to confront that teenager and let them know that you are listening to what they are saying and care enough to start a conversation about it. But keep in mind, this should be a conversation – ask for clarification and then sit back and let them respond.

 

Google it

This tends to be my go-to, especially when I don’t want them to know that I have no idea what they’re talking about…

(Don’t tell my secret), but in times like these, I pretend like I know what these words and phrases mean. It’s not hard to figure out that they aren’t talking about monkey bars when they say they were doing “bars” and the rest of the group either laughs or looks quickly at me to check my reaction. At the time, I had no idea what bars were, but I pretended I did, shut down the conversation and went home to safely Google-it myself.

 

At Teen Lifeline, we firmly believe in being present and active in teenagers’ lives. This may mean asking awkward questions or having uncomfortable conversations when you figure out what they are actually talking about. But it is worth it! Show that you have some street-cred and keep up to date with the newest phrases and coolest terms.

 

Here’s a good starting point if you have no idea what to listen for:

(*Disclaimer: This blog post is not meant to make you paranoid or cause you to grill your teenager as soon as they get home. Not every teenager even knows what these words mean – please don’t assume the worst! Instead of panicking, pay attention and keep the door open for positive conversations!)

Teen Lifeline Dictionary

Term MeaningExample(s)
Netflix & ChillThis is not just hanging out and watching movies - this means "hooking up" or having sex. Wanna go Netflix and chill?
BaeBefore anyone else; baby; sweetieRyan Gosling is bae.
I love you so much bae!
Hooking upCould mean literally anything - kissing, making out, sex - ask what their definition is!Did you hear that they have been hooking up?
GOATGreatest Of All Time.Tony Romo is the G.O.A.T!
Those shoes are G.O.A.T.
LitIncredibly awesome; or extremely intoxicated. This song is lit!
Last night, I got lit.
DMDirect Message - private messaging on Twitter or InstagramCan't talk now, DM me.
He slid in my DM.
Molly Drug called MDMA or ecstasy She took a Molly last night.
WTFPronounced "W-T-F," meaning "What the f***?!"WTF is wrong with you?!
GoalsWhen something is attractive or it's something you aspire to. Ben & Lauren are relationship goals.
Your hair is goals!
AFPronounced "af," meaning "As f***"I'm hungry af.
That class was boring af.
She is annoying af.
PAW or PIRParents Are Watching or Parents In Room - if you see an acronym starting with 'P' ask questions!Let's talk later PAW/PIR
VShort for "very."I'm v tired.
Dinner was v good!

Are there any other words or phrases you’re curious about? Do you have any suggestions for how to start this conversation? Share with us!

Karlie Duke was in one of Teen Lifeline’s original support groups and now is our Communications Director. She is passionate about encouraging students to live better stories.